Behind Closed Doors with Erika Ji
Erika Ji is a composer-storyteller based in New York City who will be performing a brand new original song in our upcoming Keepsake show, From Story to Song. Tickets are FREE; RSVP now! In this interview, Erika chats with Jay and Hailey about the process of writing for the show, her relationship with vulnerability, and how drawn she has always been to musical theatre.
In this semi-weekly blog series, we post in-depth interviews that take you behind closed doors (or #BCD) with independent artists, many of whom have performed or will perform in a Keepsake show.
Jay & Hailey:
How did music "begin" for you?
Erika:
I’ve loved performing, writing, and making music ever since I was a kid. Two year old me shouted Disney songs at anyone who would listen. Five year old me concocted elaborate adventures for my stuffed animals, making up lyrics for them to sing along with my brother’s video game music. At age eight, I played the innocent daughter of a smuggler in a Chinese TV show; at age eleven, I played the exuberant Centipede in James and the Giant Peach. I sang, I danced, I played piano, and throughout elementary and middle school, I wrote countless stories, a lot of (bad) poetry, the occasional parody song, and even a (very bad) 60,000-word novel—all for the joy of creating things.
In high school, I decided to step back from performing, writing, and making music. My local community valued math, science, and leadership skills, and I internalized these values, focusing on my academic and club activities. I continued to play piano and dance, so music and performance remained in my life as hobbies, but I left them as just that—hobbies. In college, while I pursued a computer science degree, I satisfied my arts craving by leading arts-focused organizations, including a vocal ensemble specializing in songs from the Great American Songbook and the planning committee for a Viennese Ball. After college, while I worked as a product manager at Dropbox, I found joy through singing in vocal ensembles, taking private voice lessons, and playing a lead role in Dropbox’s very own company musical.
“When I asked myself how I would spend my time if money were no object, I found myself truthfully answering: I want to write songs, compose music, and grow into a confident musician and artistic leader.”
Although I enjoyed my time and the people at Dropbox, I couldn’t shake the feeling that something important was missing from my life. I had trouble articulating why, because I genuinely felt that I had gotten what I’d wanted: a fascinating job, a team of thoughtful people who collaborated with both kindness and intensity, a compensation package that my parents couldn’t have even dreamed of when they first immigrated to the United States. It was only after I moved to New York and began to meet more people who chose to make the arts a central part of their lives that I realized I wanted music to play a more central part in my life, too. I began to spend nearly all of my free time doing music-related things: singing in and directing for two choruses, working late so I could take voice lessons during morning hours, and analyzing lyrics on weekends to guide my interpretive choices. And I wasn’t bored or tired at all—I just wanted more.
My whole adult life, I had told myself that performing, writing, and music were things I just did for fun. But as I spent more and more of my time living in the world of music and the arts, I felt something inside me, raw and real, telling me that even if I didn’t quite know what role I wanted music to play in my life yet, spending more time with music would lead me in the right direction. When I asked myself how I would spend my time if money were no object, I found myself truthfully answering: I want to write songs, compose music, and grow into a confident musician and artistic leader.
A few years ago, I decided to take time away from a more traditional career path in order to explore my relationship with music. I have been exploring music with most of my time for a little over three years now, and my fascination with music and storytelling only continues to grow.
Jay & Hailey:
How would you describe your art to somebody in three sentences or less?
Erika:
I'm a cross-genre composer-storyteller who loves soaring melodies, dream worlds, and big passion. I'm inspired by the epic energy of nouveau cirque, the lush soundscapes of classical orchestras, the character-driven storytelling of musical theatre, the immersive power of film & game music, and the authentic heart of indie & nomad folk songs. I'm fascinated by stories that challenge our preconceptions about what we think is true, good, right, or worth wanting, and my favorite stories make me laugh, cry, feel, and think.
Jay & Hailey:
What is the thing you are most known for? What would you like to be most known for?
Erika:
I would love to be known as a vibrant force upon the world, creating work that expresses authentic vulnerability and passionate joy. I would love to be known as an artist who leads with both inspiring vision and practical execution, and who cares deeply about supporting the people around her toward what matters to them.
Jay & Hailey:
You're performing in our upcoming show, From Story to Song, which is a special show for us because of its storytelling and paired artist aspects. What has it been like working with your partnered Storyteller so far and what can you tease about the story you'll be sharing at the show?
Erika:
When I met my Storyteller partner, I was struck by the honest and genuine way in which she reflects and talks about her experiences. She’s unafraid to live inside the complexities and questions in order to understand the real nature of things. And she has a rare ability to simultaneously acknowledge and honor the weight of traumatic experiences while embracing the childlike joy and silliness that makes being alive sparkle.
Needless to say, getting to write a song inspired by her storytelling was a beautiful gift. "middles and grays” explores what it means for other people to take our words and stories and use them for their own agendas. It’s messy. It’s filled with images and feelings and questions. Also, silly food metaphors. A song can never have too many silly food metaphors.
Erika will perform in the upcoming Keepsake House show, From Story to Song, at The Clemente in the Lower East Side on Saturday, October 30. Tickets are FREE; RSVP now!
Jay & Hailey:
How do you approach the craft of storytelling? How does this process of writing someone else's story differ from writing your own?
Erika:
I often start my storytelling process by asking: what’s inspiring me? What feels important to me? I let myself spin outward, brainstorming and collecting questions, images, and phrases that I’m drawn to. Over time, the ideas coalesce into fragments of songs or shows or experiences.
As a composer-storyteller who often works in theatrical contexts, I’m actually usually writing songs for stories that are not my own, and also often writing the music while another collaborator writes the lyrics. So when my partnered Storyteller and I decided that I would have the freedom to write a song inspired by her story (rather than directly retelling it), and that I would write both music and lyrics, that actually meant having more agency than I’m used to. That said, especially since “middles and grays” is about how other people retell our stories for their own agendas, it was especially important to me that the direction I went in felt true to what the Storyteller wanted to say.
Jay & Hailey:
This show, and art making in general, require a certain amount of vulnerability. In life and/or work, how do you balance being vulnerable and protecting yourself?
Erika:
Oh gosh.
In my early twenties, I came across Brene Brown’s TED talk on vulnerability, read the book Difficult Conversations, and became friends with some incredible human beings. I felt encouraged to share more of my true and imperfect self, despite crippling fear. I opened my heart—and friends were there to catch me with their warmth.
“I am a firm believer in the power and responsibility of artists to shape culture and society. If we each make art that reflects our values, through a process that reflects our values, we can collectively change the narratives that guide how we live.”
I am still all too often afraid to be vulnerable. I worry that people will not like me. I worry that I am not good enough. But I am lucky that I now know many people who will welcome me with warmth no matter what. I try to let my guard down and keep my heart open, even though I've been hurt before, because I know it will be worth it. And I try to bring warmth to others, so that they feel safe to be vulnerable around me, too.
Jay & Hailey:
Can you share one important thing you've learned about yourself and/or your creative process through your art?
Erika:
As a person who values intentionality, I’ve been delighted to discover that I love the creative energy of embracing what comes intuitively rather than trying to drive things forward.
Jay & Hailey:
Is social justice a big part of your art? Do you explore themes of race, sexuality, and/or gender in your work? In what ways do you hope your art can inspire future movements and conversations?
Erika:
I am a firm believer in the power and responsibility of artists to shape culture and society. If we each make art that reflects our values, through a process that reflects our values, we can collectively change the narratives that guide how we live.
Both of my current large-scale projects engage with questions about race as it intersects with gender or class. VISARE explores how a community of Asian immigrant laborers navigate broken systems of power and privilege. Yoko’s Husband’s Killer’s Japanese Wife, Gloria explores the hearts of two Japanese women who were both blamed for the actions of their white husbands.
Jay & Hailey:
Other than the Keepsake show, what projects are you working on right now and do you have anything coming up that you'd like to promote? What are the best ways our audiences can support you and your work?
Erika:
On October 31, Clare Fuyuko Bierman and I are premiering untitled hat project, a tiny immersive experience at an eclectic hatmaker's studio in Williamsburg.
The concept art for VISARE.
In 2022, Clare Fuyuko Bierman, Brandy Hoang Collier, and I will share work from our new musical, Yoko's Husband's Killer's Japanese Wife, Gloria, commissioned by the 5th Avenue Theatre.
Also in 2022, Clare Fuyuko Bierman and I will begin sharing work from our new concept album for VISARE, an immersive circus experience.
If you’d like to hear more about these and other projects, come say hi after the show! You can also email me, join my mailing list, or follow my Instagram stories.
Jay & Hailey:
At Keepsake House, we talk a lot about the magic in live shows and the communities they help create, almost like every live performance is itself a keepsake that you cherish from a whole house of life experiences. Tell us about your most memorable or fulfilling live performance, the one you would grab first in a fire.
Erika:
A few years ago, before I decided to dedicate my life to music and stories and art, I went to Paris for a composer’s program. As part of our training, all of us composers sang in a choir together.
One day, our conductor took us to a private chapel at the Catholic Church of the Val-de-Grâce. The space felt historied; the sound felt warm. We sang Rachmaninoff's “Bogoroditse Devo.”
There was no audience except ourselves. And yet there was something in the beauty of the music, of my voice rising and intertwining with the others, that felt so undeniable, so real, that tears came to my eyes.
I couldn’t tell you why. But that was the moment I decided that I would continue to follow the music.
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